Week 2 is upon us and it’s time to see what is a trend from Week 1 and what was a fluke and how bad T**m H**s will be this week.

Turbo vs Teddy Ruxpins

So much for this being our Game of the Week.  It’s already over.  If Turbo is going to get 40 points a week out of Josh Allen, it won’t matter that he only has one RB.  If especially if that RB, Jahmyr Gibbs, is going to get him 28 points per week.  It’ll be interesting to see how Turbo fares as bye weeks and/or injuries come into play, because they really have no depth whatsoever.  The Ruxpins performed better than I expected them to last week, but still don’t look like much of a threat.  At least all of the players on their roster this week are actually in the league.

Balls of Hate vs My Ball Zach Ertz

Part of me wants to just copy/paste the previous paragraph about Turbo here and just change the names to Balls of Hate and their players.  MBZE hasn’t even had a player play a snap this week yet and they already lost.  About the only interesting thing to watch here is what they do with Nacua.  Will they risk leaving him without a pivot in place should he not play?  Will it even matter by that point?

Bolsheviks vs Trash Pandas

Maybe building your team around Giants wasn’t as bad of an idea as I thought?  Still gonna be hard to win with a group of guys that catch about as well as cops in the ‘burbs trying to catch car thieves do.  Then we have the subpar Bolsheviks who are going to stumble their way to a 2-0 record and will be sitting all along atop the HH East.  This friggin league, man.

Shock Value vs T**m H**s

Fresh off an upset loss, Shock Value gets to regroup with a bye week.  T**m H**s had three potentially legitimate players coming into the season.  Two of them are already hurt and the third is becoming Mac Jones before our very eyes.  Maybe Jeremiyah Love outscores Rico Dowdle.  Other than that, I don’t see a single position that Shock Value is going to lose to T**m H**s.  Well I guess Jake Bates did kick Tyler Bass’ ass.

Hairbear vs nWo

A real slobber-knocker here, Hairbear ran into some bad luck last week, but runs into some good luck this week in the form of getting to play nWo.  I would imagine that for nWo trying to pick out a starter between Michael Pittman, Denzel Boston, Caleb Douglas and Carnell Tate is like trying to pick out which fungus toe is his favorite little piggy.

LiQ-ourballs vs Hamburg Hooligans

Liq is better than most of the teams that I’ve looked at so far this week, but all Hamburg does is win these days.  Unless we are talking about the one game that really mattered last season, but I digress.  Liq has some good matchups for his guys this week, but so does Hamburg, and the Hooligans are just a bit stronger across the board.  They will move to 2-0 and a matchup with Balls of Hate is looming.

Mad Dogs vs Team Blitz-Craig

How do you pick against a team that already banked 34 points from their QB?  You don’t.  That’s especially true when their opponent’s big gun, Ja’Marr Chase, got outscored in Week 1 by half of the head coaches.  That likely won’t be the case this week, but Mad Dogs also has Bijan Robinson as the Falcons’ only option on offense.  They should be able to get enough from the rest of their team to outpace Blitz-Craig.

Nigerian Yaks vs nWo Wulfpack

The Yaks, always playing chess while the rest of ya’ll are playing pocket pool, knew that there was a good chance that Nico Collins was going to be out today.  Knowing that, they smoothly inserted DJ Moore, who promptly scored 0 points.  Wulfpack isn’t complaining and will ride Lamar and Devon Achane to an easy win, and sole possession of first place in the HH West.